Sex and Abstinence

S-E-X; that three letter word is so powerful. Everyone is doing it or at least it seems that way. However, I know that there are those out there who have been able to resist the temptation. I am not necessarily referring to just virgins but also those that may have had sexual intercourse but have decided t refrain from doing so again until marriage or forever. The reasons for abstinence vary and I commend anyone who has the willpower to do it. In my past I have taken what I refer to as "leaves of absence" from sex but that involved basically avoiding men. So, what I want to know is how do you date and stay abstinent? And how do you find someone who is willing to wait for you?

Sex is such a pervasive force in our society. It's all over t.v, in movies and our music and the books we read. It's almost impossible to avoid. Yet, some have the strength to do so and I want to hear how; so I welcome all comments because I have no answers for this question. And with the growing AIDS epidemic and growing number of men on the down low, abstinence seems like a better and better idea. So know that your comments and tips may save the life of someone.

We are sexual creatures and naturally feel the need to mate; however, I don't advocate underage sex because I know the consequences of those actions. So if anyone is reading this and under the age of 18, I urge you to seriously think about what you want out of life and realize that having sex too early and for the wrong reasons can derail your future.


Staying abstinent requires a lot of willpower and sheer determination. It requires immense self-control and knowledge of self-worth. Here are some tips I found on the internet and believe are helpful for anyone contemplating abstinence:

1. Avoid situations where sex is a constant, i.e...bars, house parties.

2. Set boundaries and stick to them--this is where the willpower comes in.

3. Avoid people who pressure you about sex and hat includes friends who don't agree with your lifestyle choice.

4. Spend time with others who feel the same way you do about sex and whom you can talk to openly.

5. If you are in a relationship or dating, make sure you tell the other person upfront that you are abstinent in order to avoid any unpleasant or possible dangerous situations.

6. If yo do have urges find other outlets to relieve the pressure such as exercise or getting a new hobby or volunteering.

7. Avoid drugs and alcohol...yes a glass a wine may be okay but too much can lead to loss of inhibitions and make it easier to give in to temptation.