Once A Cheater Always A Cheater?

I'm not sure of the answer. Is it possible to really reform and refrain from cheating? Are men more prone to cheating than women? A lot of women believe that all men cheat. I don't believe that. I refuse to believe that cheating is ingrained in men, like its part of their DNA. Cheating is a conscious choice that a person makes. It has more to do with how much you value and respect the person you are with than hormones. It is natural to be attracted to other people even if you are in a relationship, but just because you find someone attractive doesn't mean you have to go out and pursue that person.

I believe its a matter of why someone cheats and the level of cheating. Some people cheat just because they can while others feel neglected or unwanted. The reason why a person cheats is a key factor into whether he/she will do it again, at least in my opinion.

Bleaching for Beauty

Okay so I just saw a clip on MSNBC where the hostess is interviewing Tyra Banks about the new season of her show and a topic covered is skin bleaching. On the show Tyra has a young mother who puts bleach on her kids faces everyday!!!! WTF! Yes I have heard of people bleaching their skin to look lighter but seriously, how warped do you have to be? How can you hate your skin color so much that you would subject your children to a dangerous process that could have them ending up resembling Michael Jackson? No matter how much you bleach your skin you will never be white, so why do it? This woman is teaching her children to hate themselves and hate their culture and that breaks my heart. It's sad to see people still falling for the misconception that lighter is better. If God wanted you to be white he would have made it happen.

Bleaching your skin will return the same results as becoming anorexic. You will look horrible. To have such a distorted image of yourself is something only therapy can help with. I wonder what happened to theses people to make them resort to skin bleaching. It's ironic how white people go to the tanning salon to get darker skin and here we are trying to lighten our skin. When will people learn to love themselves for who they are and not what they think society approves of? There will always be people who will dislike you for some reason albeit it be your skin color or your IQ, either way you should never let someone else's ideals dictate who you are. We are all beautiful in some way, I believe Black is beautiful and no one can tell me anything different. If I were white or Hispanic I would feel the same way. You should embrace your culture, not run from it. Yes we've been mistreated in this world, but bleaching your skin will not ease the burden that black people carry.

Dating No-Nos

There is a lot of dating advice being given everyday, so I thought I would add my two cents and hopefully help some unfortunate girl out. Enjoy and if you have more items to add, please comment.

1. If a man doesn't have time for you, he's most likely seeing someone else.
2. Don't give your number to the guy in the club. He's most likely drunk and will probably not call you and if he does it's not because he wants to date you.
3. Men are never truly single. (thanx B.)
4. Looks do matter, but sometimes the geek is better than the stud. He'll most likely end up rich.
5. A**holes come in every size, color and income level.
6. If he has a lot of girl "friends" at least one of them is in to him or he's slept with at least one.
7. Men are not that smart, tell them what you want.
8. There is no such thing as Mr. Right, there can be a Mr. Pretty Damn Close to Perfect but everyone has character flaws.
9. As they say "you can't turn a ho into a housewife", and you damn sure can't turn a player into a husband.
10. Don't knowingly date someone else's man, I gaurantee it will lead to trouble.
11. Sometimes a background check is necessary.
12. If you have to call a man twenty times and still no answer, he's probably out with another chick.
13. Not every man wants an anorexic skeleton, workout because you want to be healthy not to impress a man.
14. Don't play games, they always backfire and you are the loser.
15. DONT DATE A MARRIED MAN!!!
16. Don't stay with a cheater. They don't change and once the trust is broken it's pretty much impossible to get it back.
17. Don't have casual sex with a guy and then wonder why he doesn't want to be your boyfriend.
18. A guy who only says he loves you when he wants sex doesn't love you.
19. Just because he takes you out once doesn't make him your boyfriend.
20. If your gay friends thinks your man is gay, he probably is.

Abortion

With the presidential election right around the corner, this constant hot button issue has begun to rear its ugly head. Abortion has been a contentious issue between liberals and conservatives for decades, yet I don't believe anyone really has any idea what it means to abort or consider aborting a child. Abortion is something that only those who have been faced with the dilemma could possibly understand. I don't believe most women who decide to abort a fetus comes to the decision easily nor does if have anything to do with vanity. Yes there are those who advocate adoption as a viable alternative but what about the millions of children who are currently in the system who were never adopted and who have been subjected to unimaginable abuse? Abortion is not a simple solution nor is adoption or raising the child, there are so many factors involved in the decision process for a woman and I don't believe anyone should be chastised for the decision she makes.

I mean we have women microwaving their babies, were those babies better off being born or should they have been aborted and saved the suffering? Not every woman makes a good mother. I don't think it's fair to women for others who don't know her situation to judge her, I thought only God held that power. Why do we think we have a right to push our beliefs on the rest of the world, just because we believe it doesn't make it right. No matter what your position on abortion, at the end of the day it's not your right to judge a woman who has been faced with that decision especially when you don't know her circumstances.

When Arguments Go Too Far

Yesterday I had a huge argument with my boyfriend that resulted in me telling him I wanted to break up. It all started over a candy wrapper and littering, it may be the dumbest and third most volatile argument I have ever participated in. Looking back on our behavior I realize that we both overreacted to a minor situation and it caused havoc within our relationship. So when has an argument gone too far? Is it only when it comes to fist-a-cuffs or is when you say something you regret as soon as it comes out of your mouth? Arguments are bound to happen in any relationship so why do we allow them to escalate out of control especially when you know you still want to be with the person? Why do we allow our anger to get the best of our reasoning and maturity? Why must we be right even when we know we are wrong? Human nature dictates that we win at what we do even if its arguing. We all want to come out on top even when it hurts those closes to us.

Sometimes our anger gets the best of us and it costs us that which we care most about. I for one need to learn how to to better communicate my feelings to others without resorting to profanity and namecalling; it's learned behavior that I really need to unlearn. Our environments growing up play a huge part in dictating our own behavior, we often do what we are shown growing up. I know I grew up in a volatile household where profanity and name calling were prevalent which is why I display the same behavior myself. I'm not making excuses, I know my behavior is wrong and I would like to change it, but I know it will take patience and a lot of time.

Why Do Smart People Do Dumb Things?

It is usually believed that people who have attained a certain stature in life or either really lucky or fairly intelligent excluding George W., of course. So why do these people do such dumb things. John Edwards and his affair and love child, Detroit mayor Kwame Kilpatrick recently convicted of perjury and obstruction of justice, Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich being named as part of a fraud and kickback scandal, former New York Gov. Spitzer and his need for prostitutes. All of these men are intelligent people who one would believe would know the consequences of doing something so stupid as the acts that committed, especially since they are all attorneys and should know the legal ramifications of their actions. So why do they do it? Is it because they believe they are invincible or above the law? Just because you are in a powerful position doesn't mean you can do whatever the hell you want without any consequences for your actions. As a matter of fact you are in the worse position because every minute of your life is being scrutinized at all times, there is always someone watching you.

These intelligent powerful people who commit stupid acts deserve to be punished. Like someone I know said, they should get jail time just for being so stupid. They don't deserve any sympathy from us because they had it all and threw it away when we are struggling just to get by and make something of ourselves. These people deserve our ire and annoyance with them. Why should they break the law and get away with it when we know people are jailed everyday? Maybe if state and federal governments spend more time cracking down on corruption, fraud, kickbacks, and such we wouldn't be in a recession right now. It's time the government handle its business with its own kind.