Single Mothers

Being a single mother has to be the hardest job in the world. It takes more endurance and perseverance than one can imagine. Being a single mother is a bond that many women share, particularly black women. Raising children in a two parent household can be trying at times but attempting to do so alone is even more of a challenge and if you don't have money than it at time seems like an impossible task. Being a single parent and coming from a single parent household I know the trials and tribulations that women go through trying to raise children on their own. This task is especially taxing for a single mother of a boy or boys. All young boys need a father figure. A mother can only do so much to keep a young man on the straight and narrow. A male child needs a man to show him what it means to be a real man, to show him how a real man acts and treats women. Instead we have so many young boys growing up with the only male figures they see are those standing on the street corners selling drugs and driving expensive cars and wearing expensive clothing, disrespecting women and behaving as if the life they live is the best way to live. The young boys growing up in this environment without a father around to instill in them the values they need to see that this is the wrong path to take soon become one of the local drug dealers hanging on the corner and treating women like they are just another bitch or ho. Many single mothers try to keep their children away from this environment but the fast life draws them in like a fly to a spider's web. The lure of fast money is great when you sit and watch your mother struggling just to make ends meet. A young man may have the best intentions in the world, but once he gets caught up in the game, there's usually only two ways out: prison or the grave.

There are many males that are products of single family home and they grow up to be decent young men. In my experience, these young men either had a mother who was tough as nails and/or had some type of positive male influence around to help mold them into righteous individuals. Of course it's becoming harder and harder to find men, who aren't the fathers, who are willing to play these roles. Young men are more disrespectful now then they have ever been. Whether this is a result of their environments and influences or bad parenting or maybe the child is just a bad seed, I don't know. As a mother of a young male, I try my hardest to instill good values in my son and encourage him to seek positive goals and influences. I want him to know that the world is full of opportunities and that he can do whatever he wants, regardless of racism and prejudice. It's often been said that others can stop you temporarily, but only you can stop you permanently. I've hit enough roadblocks to know that saying is true. It takes a lot of will and determination to make it as a single parent, especially when you are a minority. I would never let the fact that I have children stop me from accomplishing my goals and providing a better life for my children and that is what I want my children to know. Nothing is too great to overcome, even when it seems like there is no way out, God will make a way. That believe is what has kept many single mothers going and striving to make it. So for all of ya'll out there trying to raise kids on your own, in the infamous words of Tupac "keep your head up." Things will get brighter as long as you continue to persevere and put God first and don't let anyone tell you that you and your children aren't worthy of more.