"You Can't Ride A Man's Back Unless It's Bent"

As we celebrate MLK today, I realize that despite his flaws, he was a highly intelligent man who spoke the truth as it was in his time for black people and that truth is still, sadly, relevant today. Dr, King once said "No nation can suffer any greater tragedy than to cause millions of its citizens to feel that they have no stake in their own society". No truer words have ever been spoken. The U.S. has spent well over a hundred years ensuring that black Americans feel demoralized, de-humanized and un-American. We were treated as property, bought and sold like a piece of meat. We were told by everyone including our Founding Fathers that we were less than a person. The harsh reality is this is still the case. Black Americans have never felt like was there country, despite it being built on their backs. It's this feeling of being inferior and not true Americans that has persisted for hundreds of years and even now plays a part in the cureent de-huminazation of Black Americans. If this country recognized Blacks as equal citizens, the many, many cases of unarmed Black men being killed would not be occuring. This mentality has also led to so many young Blacks not feeling as if they can succeed in life. They have never felt like a part of this society. The blame for this isn't solely that of those that seek to keep them down but they are also victims of their own defeatist mentality. Without a rememdy for both of these things, this country will never be as great as it could be.

Dying Wish

So I finished watching a reality show and the episode contained a scene in which a young woman, who is dying, was granted a dying wish. The dying wish was to meet this particular celebrity. This begged the question, if I were given a few months to live,what would be my dying wish, the one thing I had to do before leaving this Earth? As I sit here typing this, I don't know what that wish would be but I do know what it wouldn't be-meeting a damn celebrity. I know different people have different things that bring them joy but for some reason this really bothers me. This is due partly to knowing how we place these people on a higher pedestal simply because they are rich and bring us entertainment, forgetting that they are the same as us. We also seem to forget that we don't really know these people or how they are in their real lives, we only see what they want us to see. For me, if I were granted a dying wish, I wouldn't waste it on meeting a celebrity, someone I don't know and who probably won't show me the real him/her. I'd much rather travel to a place I've always wanted to see or do something I've always wanted to do but either couldn't afford or was to scared to take the risk. But then again, to each her own.

How Much Longer?

Black lives matter. As I try to wrap my mind around the decisions made in the wake of the deaths of so many of our Black men to not indict those who took their lives, it saddens me that after all the years we have fought just to be considered equal, that that is still not a reality. Michael Brown, Trayvon Martin, Eric Garner, Oscar Grant, Amadou Diallo, Darrien Hunt, and the list goes on. All of these men died senseless deaths and received no justice. I don't condone bad nehavior by anyone. I won't make the argument that any of these men were angels, simply because it doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is the circumstances surrounding their deaths. Whether they deserve justice or not should not hunge on the color of their skin and whether they ever got in trouble. What angers me the most and allows me to view the men who commit these acts as racists, is the lack of remorse after the fact. You took someone's life and yet you feel no remorse? As a mother of a black son, I am petrified that one day it could be him lying dead on the pavement for hours. My son is a good child, he has never been in trouble, raised in the suburbs, he doesn't know how it feels to grow up black and poor and harbor so much anger and resentment against those who are supposed to protect you but even so he is still in danger, simply because of the color of his sking. What can I as a mother do to shield him and protect him when he's outside of my safety blanket? Do I tell him to obey everything a police officer tells him to do and never talk back even if he sees his white friends doing just that? Do I tell him to neevr make any sudden movements when confronted by the police? Do I tell him that because his skin is black, that his rights will be violated and nine times out of ten there will be no justice for those violations? Do I tell him that no matter how successful he becomes in live, even he he becomes president, he will always be viewe d as black first and thereby making him inferior in the eyes of others. Why is this the burden of every black mother with a son? How much longer can we suffer at the hands of ignorance before it all becomes too much? I don't deny that there is a huge problem in the black community with fathers not raising their children. I don't deny that there is black on black crime, usually gang violence. These are facts but so are the fact that so many of those committing crimes see no way out. They don't have any love in their lives or they are looking for protection and the only way to protect yourself and your family is to become part of the problem. With that being said, black people are not the only ones committing crimes but yet we are the only ones judged as a group. If a young black man in a gang kills another young black man in a gang, that image of them being criminals and murders is projected on to all young black men who may happen to live where they live or dress the way they dress. On the contrary, when a yound white male decides to shoot up an elementary school and kill 25 children, he was just a troubled young man. His peers are not judged by his actions. That has always been the burden of being black.

Alzheimers

I have never been around someone with this debilitating disease until recently. Witnessing first hand the affects of this disease is scary and I only pray it doesn't happen to any of my love one or myself. To lose your mind is incomprehensible. This past Friday I was backing out of my driveway to go pick my boyfriend up from oral surgery, when an elderly lady flagged my car down. Thinking it may be one of my neighbors, I stopped. The lady began speaking to me in Polish, of which I didn't understand a word but I was able to ascertain that she was lost and attempting to give me her address. Seeing how flustered and scared she was, I couldn't possible leave her there. So I decided to call some people I knew who spoke Polish and try and figure out what she was saying. It was determined that she was reciting her address in Poland. This elderly lady had no idea where she was and just wanted to go home, to Poland. By this time, I had figured out that she was most likely suffering from Alzheimer's. Eventually she was able to find a slip of paper in her purse which stated she was an Alzheimer's patient and provided an emergency contact number. Just my luck, the emergency contact person didn't pick up her phone any of the 4 times I called her. At this point, I had no choice but to call 311 and have the police come out. During this 40 minute ordeal, the poor lady just kept repeating her Polish address and my heart went out to her. To have your memory stripped away like that has got to be one of the most awful things to happen to a person. To not know who you are or where you are is frightening. I shutter to think what could have happened to her if someone with ill intentions had been the one to find her. How she got to my subdivision, I'll never know but I am thankful I was there to help and I pray that if I ever suffer from this disease there will be someone willing to help me. And thankfully my boyfriend was understanding as to why I was an hour late picking him up, I'm sure the drugs helped mellow him out.

First Elected Black Politician in Russia

I just read this story. Wonders cease to exist. This small Russian village elected an African to a political position. First black person to ever have that honor in Russia. Maybe if the entire world embraced people based on who they are as opposed to the color of their skin, racism could actually cease to exist; of course I wouldn't hold my breath for that. But it's always nice to here about a person of color excelling where no one would fathom he would. Below is the actual article from the Huffington Post:

NOVOZAVIDOVO, Russia — People in this Russian town used to stare at Jean Gregoire Sagbo because they had never seen a black man. Now they say they see in him something equally rare – an honest politician.

Sagbo last month became the first black to be elected to office in Russia.

In a country where racism is entrenched and often violent, Sagbo's election as one of Novozavidovo's 10 municipal councilors is a milestone. But among the town's 10,000 people, the 48-year-old from the West African country of Benin is viewed simply a Russian who cares about his hometown.

He promises to revive the impoverished, garbage-strewn town where he has lived for 21 years and raised a family. His plans include reducing rampant drug addiction, cleaning up a polluted lake and delivering heating to homes.

"Novozavidovo is dying," Sagbo said in an interview in the ramshackle municipal building. "This is my home, my town. We can't live like this."

"His skin is black but he is Russian inside," said Vyacheslav Arakelov, the mayor. "The way he cares about this place, only a Russian can care."

Sagbo isn't the first black in Russian politics. Another West African, Joaquin Crima of Guinea-Bissau, ran for head of a southern Russian district a year ago but was heavily defeated.

Crima was dubbed by the media "Russia's Obama." Now they've shifted the title to Sagbo, much to his annoyance.

"My name is not Obama. It's sensationalism," he said. "He is black and I am black, but it's a totally different situation."

Story continues below

Inspired by communist ideology, Sagbo came to Soviet Russia in 1982 to study economics in Moscow. There he met his wife, a Novozavidovo native. He moved to the town about 100 kilometers (65 miles) north of Moscow in 1989 to be close to his in-laws.

Today he is a father of two, and negotiates real estate sales for a Moscow conglomerate. His council job is unpaid.

Sagbo says neither he nor his wife wanted him to get into politics, viewing it as a dirty, dangerous business, but the town council and residents persuaded him to run for office.

They already knew him as a man of strong civic impulse. He had cleaned the entrance to his apartment building, planted flowers and spent his own money on street improvements. Ten years ago he organized volunteers and started what became an annual day of collecting garbage.

He said he feels no racism in the town. "I am one of them. I am home here," Sagbo said.

He felt that during his first year in the town, when his 4-year-old son Maxim came home in tears, saying a teenage boy spat at him. Sagbo ran outside in a rage, demanding that the spitter explain himself. Women sitting nearby also berated the teenager. Then the whole street joined in.

Russia's black population hasn't been officially counted but some studies estimate about 40,000 "Afro-Russians." Many are attracted by universities that are less costly than in the West. Scores of them suffer racially motivated attacks every year – 49 in Moscow alone in 2009, according to the Moscow Protestant Chaplaincy Task Force on Racial Violence and Harassment, an advocacy group.

After the Soviet Union collapsed, Novozavidovo's industries were rapidly privatized, leaving it in financial ruin.

High unemployment, corruption, alcoholism and pollution blight what was once an idyllic town, just a short distance from the Zavidovo National Park, where Prime Minister Vladimir Putin and President Dmitry Medvedev take nature retreats.

Denis Voronin, a 33-year-old engineer in Novozavidovo, said Sagbo was the town's first politician to get elected fairly, without resorting to buying votes

"Previous politicians were all criminals," he said.

A former administration head – the equivalent of mayor in rural Russia – was shot to death by unknown assailants two years ago.

The post is now held by Arakelov, a veteran of the Soviet war in Afghanistan who says he also wants to clean up corruption. He says money used to constantly disappear from the town budget and is being investigated by tax police.

Residents say they pay providers for heat and hot water, but because of ineffective monitoring by the municipality they don't get much of either. The toilet in the municipal building is a room with a hole in the floor.

As a councilor, Sagbo has already scored some successes. He mobilized residents to collect money and turn dilapidated lots between buildings into colorful playgrounds with new swings and painted fences.

As he strolled around his neighborhood everyone greeted him and he responded in his fluent, French-African-accented Russian. Boys waved to Sagbo, who had promised them a soccer field.

Sitting in the newly painted playground with her son, Irina Danilenko said it was the only improvement she has seen in the five years she has lived here.

"We don't care about his race," said Danilenko, 31. "We consider him one of us."

30 Things Women Should Stop Doing By 30

I ran across this article a week or so ago and I found a few of the items interesting. Approaching 30 myself, I looked to see if I was guilty of still doing any of the things that made the list. There were many things on the list I would never do including making out with my friends at a bar simply because I never saw the appeal of kissing another girl. As for not having regular gyno exams, any grown woman who doesn't do that needs a reality check. By the time you are 30, you should know how important your health is, no excuses. As for living paycheck to paycheck, in this economy that is a definite reality even when you're 40. Most of the things on the list were things I didn't think a 25 year old should be doing let alone a 30 year old, but I'll let you be the judge. Here's the list:

1. Buying clothes from the junior section.
2. Forgetting her parents’ birthdays.
3. Making out with her BFFs at bars for attention.
4. Making out with her boyfriend at bars for attention.
5. Filling her bed with stuffed animals (really, even one is too many).
6. Carrying a torch for anyone she hasn’t seen in the last five years.
7. Rebelling against her parents for the sake of rebelling against her parents.
8. Declaring an entire gender “all jerks.”
9. Holding a grudge against anyone who wronged her in high school.
10. Skipping regular gyno exams.
11. Going to bed without washing and moisturizing her face.
12. Being “that person” who had a bit too much to drink at the office party.
13. Crushing on Justin Bieber.
14. Thinking she’s got it all figured out.
15. Calling her father “daddy.”
16. Engaging in sibling rivalry.
17. Trying to get by on her looks.
18. Living paycheck to paycheck.
19. Expecting a man/knight in shining armor to swoop in and save her.
20. Aimlessly jumping from job to job.
21. Using MySpace to pick up guys.
22. Expecting a man to do all the wooing.
23. Wishing she had someone else’s life.
24. Expecting everyone to drop everything because it’s her birthday ...
25. ... or because her “boyfriend” of two weeks dumped her.
26. Measuring her self-worth by a number on the scale.
27. Being cheap.
28. Quitting a job without having a new one lined up first (especially in this economy!).
29. Blaming her mother for all her issues.
30. Romanticizing her 20s.

Beauty Is In the Eye of the Beholder

I came across this article today about discrimination in the workplace based on looks and how there should be a federal law against discriminating on looks same as there is for sex and age and disability. In the news recently has been a story about a former Citibank employee suing her former employer for discriminating against her because of her looks. When I first read the story, I didn't think much of it; people get fired for worse reasons. Not many people get fired for being too sexy and hot. But that story coupled with this article makes me think; how much do hiring and firing decisions depend on your looks. We all know that they play a factor but not how big of a factor. Would NASA hire an astronaut with less skills but who happens to be beautiful rather than the balding, fat guy or slightly overweight acne prone extremely qualified female? Would you sacrifice quality of work just to have a pretty face around? Unlike race or age or disability, looks is something that most people can change to a certain degree to make themselves more aesthetically pleasing. Even if a company hired someone for their looks if that person failed to perform the job properly and costs the company money, he would surely be fired. Nothing comes before the bottom line. Would you hire someone based on looks or fire someone who became unsightly due to weight gain or any other causes or would you base your decision on who is the best person for the job?

Sexual Experimentation

Why is society more accepting of women experimenting sexually than men who do so? It's okay for a woman to kiss another woman, even "sleep" with another woman. Yet if a man were to experiment with another guy by kissing or exhibiting any type of sexual behavior he is deemed gay. Why aren't women who experiment with other women deemed gay automatically? Is it because men get off on seeing two women together or is it because two women can't truly engage in sexual intercourse? Personally I think a person should choose a side and stick with it but that's just my opinion. I don't differentiate between women who experiment and men who do the same. Every one's sexual needs are different and no one has a right to tell a person what is right or wrong for them; but the double standard that exists when it comes to sexuality is wrong. It's okay for Katy Perry to sign about kissing a girl but no straight guy could ever get away with singing about kissing another guy. We are all hypocrites some more so than others but maybe if we stop judging other people and let them be who they are the world would be a nicer happier place.

What's In A Name

I had a conversation today about whether having a black sounding name is a factor in whether you get a call for a job interview or not. I tend to believe it does play a factor for some people. As much as we want to believe in this post-racial modern world, it doesn't exist.There are still people that judge you based on your skin color. So yes it's possible that someone in human resources or whoever looks at resumes may have seen Laquisha Jackson and automatically tossed it in the trash. I can't say how common this practice is but I can say that I believe it occurs.

For as long as I can remember minorities, particularly blacks have always been judged as a group. If one of us does something wrong, we all are stereotyped. The public image of blacks makes intelligent blacks seem like a huge exception to the rule instead of the rule itself. There are many reasons behind this, some may even say some are correct in their perpetuation of the black image; but I was taught to judge every man based on his own qualities and character not on those of his brother or his cousin Ray-Ray. So the images that are portrayed of blacks in the media as thugs and buffoons is projected upon us as a race which then makes it harder for those of us who don't fit in that category. We have to jump through hoops to disprove stereotypes. It's not fair, but whoever said life is fair. Why doesn't the name Helikopter (real name) elicit the same resume trashing as say a Nykesha? Will there ever be a time when blacks are judged individually and not as a group? Despite what some may think, we can't all sing, dance, play sports, and not every LaQuisha is welfare baby-mama. Please open your eyes and see that a name doesn't define a person just like the color of my skin doesn't determine my intelligence or character.

Sincere Ignorance and Conscientious Stupidity

"Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity." Martin Luther King definitely knew what he was talking about when he said those words. There seems to be an over abundance of both these days. It saddens me to live in this world. The lack of common sense amongst people is astounding. I remember jokingly asking people if they are really that stupid and it seems that some people truly are. it's sad that the society we live in is filled with morons who spew hatred not because they want to inflame but because they truly are ignorant and are consciously stupid about the world we live in and the roles we play.

The onslaught of racists statements that have been making the news lately don't bother me. I was never under the impression that we live in a post-racial world. There will always be ignorant people in the world and therefore there will always be racism. I don't see the point of me getting upset every time some idiot makes a racial comment. I don't really care what ignorant people believe. I know who I am and I know what I am capable of , what anyone else thinks is irrelevant. So for all those out there who are sincerely ignorant and consciously stupid, I feel sorry for you and I can only hope that one day a drop of intelligence will seep into your vacuous minds.

Chicago Public Schools:Every Child Left Behind

I know the economy sucks and most industries are suffering including the education industry. Here in Chicago CPS (Chicago Public School) system has a budget deficit of $600 million. That's a lot of money and I always wonder how government gets into such debts. It was recently revealed that CPS upper management such as CEO Ron Huberman (still can't figure out what an ex-cop and for CTA person knows about education) are getting pay raises. Whoo-hoo, except in the same token CPS is planning on cutting over 2600 teachers, cutting funds for non-varsity sports, reducing after-school programs, reducing funding of programs such as gifted and talented and worse of all increasing teacher student ratios to 1:35. Can some one please stop the madness. How does CPS justify pay increases when it, as one of the worst school districts, is planning on implementing cuts that will undoubtedly make getting a good education in a CPS even harder. Why is it that the upper echelon is always rewarded while the little people who they are supposed to be helping continuously get the shaft? Most often in life the people who need something the most are least likely to get it.

The majority of CPS students are minorities so perhaps that may explain why the City of Chicago doesn't give a damn about them. So many of these children are born at a disadvantage and then are told that they can still obtain the "American Dream" yet the same people who are telling them this are the ones who keeping pulling that dream farther and farther away. With teacher student ratios of 1:35, we will no longer have to wonder why Jason is in the 6th grade but still reads at a 2nd grade level. It's because his teachers weren't able to give him the individual attention he needs. Why make children suffer for the mistakes of others?

What Would You Do?

If you suddenly came into a great deal of money, say you won the lottery. Most people know that when something like that happens, people tend to come out of the wood works. Family you haven't seen in years suddenly shows up and old "friends" who barely spoke to you before; suddenly your life is full of people who didn't really give a damn about you until you had something they wanted. What would you do? Would you share your good fortunate with these money grubbing people or tell them all to f-off?

Black Hair and Exercising

I recently began working out again and it just so happened to be a few days before one of my hair appointments. I tend to not work out on days I get my hair done because I feel like I spent to much money to sweat it out the same or next day. Looking on line for the best ways to protect your style after working out, I noticed that there were a lot of post from Black women complaining about what to do with their hair so that they can work out and still keep their "do looking fresh. It seems many Black women don't work out because they don't want to mess up their hair. I feel them on that. The last think you want to do is go to the gym and sweat after spending $50-$100 (or more) for a salon visit.

Unfortunately for a lot of Black women, they don't have "good" hair. So after working out you feel like you have to wash your hair, dry it and flat iron it since so many of us go for the relaxed style. That's a lot of work especially after you just paid someone money to do these things for you. Then an added problem is we can't wash our hair everyday. So what do we do work out or keep your hair looking good?

I just got highlights in my hair so I can't flat iron it often. I wish I could afford weekly salon trips but that's not the situation right now. Although I go every two weeks, what do I do for those 13 days in between. Do I work out and hope I don't sweat profusely or do I be a lard ass? I have chosen to work out. I have short hair so a ponytail or bun isn't an option. So in my quest to be healthy and keep my hair fabulous, I keep it wrapped in a scarf when I work out and which keeps my hair dry and my sweaty edges from napping up (for some this may actually cause you to sweat more depending on your body). Another option is to wear a cotton headband and from what I've read putting a little baby powder in your head after a work out may work. So whatever you do don't let your hair be the reason you don't work out. It is possible to be healthy and have fabulous hair.

Is Our Society Oversexed?

At this point in my life I try my best to not listen to the radio (thanks to the ipod adapter built into my car) or watch music videos. Why? Our culture has become completely over sexed in my opinion. Our kids know way too much about sex even if they don't completely understand it. What responsible parent wants his/her child singing the lyrics to "I wanna **** every girl in the world"? My eight year old daughter has told me that students in her class have gotten in trouble for saying and doing sex related things. Wonder where they got the ideas for it? Most likely from TV or some very irresponsible freaky parents.

In black culture there tends to be an over population of sex related music. Even R&B songs nowadays typically consist of sexually charged lyrics. Back in the day we left that to the blues singers (Candylicker). I guess in my old age I'm coming to realize that something has to give. Sex is everywhere. Everyone has a sex tape or a supposed sex addiction. There are adult cartoons, sex scenes in almost every movie, warnings to vaccinate your 12 year old daughter for HPV before she "hopefully" begins to have sex, singers giving interviews about what they like sexually or wannabe rappers going on about their sexual prowess. Everything is sex! When you have 12 and 13 year old kids having babies, something is definitely wrong.

As a mother, I want to do whatever I can to protect my kids from the harshness of the world but when teachers are participating in lap dances at pep rallies, how much can you really protect you kids? The world is on its way to hell in a handbasket and I just hope someone can pull it back before it reaches the inferno.

Smart Jocks

I was reading an article yesterday about a top high school basketball player declaring where he was going to college. In the article the writer mentions that the young man has a 4.3 g.p.a. Based on that small piece of information I knew their would be some racist comments made and I was correct. Apparently some people don't realize that it is possible to obtain something higher than a 4.0 in high school. Obviously they weren't taking AP classes.

Here's a story about a young man who has athletic prowess and intelligence and yet instead of being honored for that he is condemned by ignorant people who obviously have some personal; issues they need to work on. If the player had been white, there would not have been any comments made about him getting people to do his work or any other idiotic comment. When will people accept that there are intelligent black people who excel at sports. Its not an either/or situation.

Yes our school system has failed so many black athletes simply because all they cared about was the money the kid would bring to the school and not about educating him/her. However, there are exceptions. Black children often feel as if it;s an either/or situation and it is up to us as parents and teachers and friends to help them see that it doesn't have to be that way.

Another comment that irked me was how people questioned his decision to attend a basketball school rather than attempt to attend an ivy league school. I don't think there is a right or wrong decision. Obviously the kid wants to go to the NBA and make a crap load of money. Can you blame him? He probably didn't grow up in the best of neighborhoods and every little hood boy dreams of buying his mother a big ole house. Attending an Ivy League school would have been great also on one level. People bestow a lot of credence on a degree from an Ivy League school which I don't necessarily agree with but that's another post. I made a decision not to attend an Ivy League school. It's a personal decision that one makes for himself. Sure there are people who would kill to attend Harvard, (literally) but not everyone is a could fit for Ivy League. Why can't we just be happy that the young man obviously has a good head on his shoulder and hope that he takes that basketball scholarship and get an education with it.

I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T

Being independent is what most of us dream about when we are teenagers. We can't wait to go off to college, have our own place, ...etc. Of course once that does happen most of finally began to realize how hard it is being an adult. No one is going to do your laundry, cook for you, pay your credit card bill or car note. It's at that point that we realize that being independent can suck. I want my mommy! Of course on the flip side, you don't have anyone telling you what to do or yelling at you for staying out late on a school night or eating in front of the t.v.

Independence is what we all crave and yet so many young adults are losing part of their independence because the economy is forcing them to move back home. Can you imagine leaving with your parents again? My neighbor just moved back in with her mother and she is like 40 because its hard to stay afloat right now. There's that part of me that envies her having family around to fall back on. I would gladly love to save the damn near $2000 I spend on rent a month and built in babysitters. Yes! But then I think about how insanely dysfunctional my family is and realize I'm better off on my own at least as far as my sanity goes.

So if you are struggling in this economy don't be afraid to move home. Your independence will still be there; just get used to the disapproving looks from your parents and the lectures on how to live your life. Pretend your 16 again and tune them out.

Are Some People Inherently Evil?

Every day in the news there is at least one story that highlights the depravity of the human being. This leads me to wonder if some people are inherently evil? I know we like to believe that everyone is born good and that there are circumstances in out lives that shape who we are; which I believe to a certain extent. But what about the serial killer who had a great childhood or the child rapist who grew up in a loving two family home. Are people like that born evil?

There are people in the world who have never done a good deed in their lives, are they inherently evil or is it just their environment? When I read a story about a 18 month old baby being sexually molested or a parent whoring out his/her child or a mother chopping her baby into pieces and frying her, I can't help but to wonder if these people are truly evil. Not just sick or misguided but evil.

I can't fathom another answer for why some people do the incredibly mind blowing most awful things one can think of, can you?

Is everyone gay now?

It seems like every time I go on a blog or gossip site; the writers are referring to some celebrity (any person in the spotlight) as being gay. When did everyone become gay simply because of the way they look or dress, I have no problem with homosexuality, but is it necessary to constantly claim someone who you probably don't even know as being gay? And even if the person is gay, why does it matter? Will he be any less of a performer or actor or model if he is gay? Will women no longer listen to his music? I don't think so.

When will being gay no longer be a shocking item like being black and intelligent has been for ages? Perhaps if we spent less time focused on the sexuality of other people, we could have healthy meaningful relationships ourselves. I know a lot of women, particularly black women, have dealt with the down low brother; but just because one guy wasn't honest about his sexuality doesn't mean they all are lying.

Undesirable Undies

So I recently watched a video from the Today Show and it centered around retailers selling used underwear. Can you say gross!!! The reporters went and bought the underwear, took all the tags off and then went and tried to return them and most of the retailers accepted them. Then the reporters went and bought underwear again and spotted them with a liquid. The retailers still accepted the return! I'm not talking about the stores that sell panties 5 for $10 but actual department stores and chains such as everyone's favorite Victoria's Secret, Nordstroms, the Gap and Macy's. I have always been under the impression that underwear was non returnable, particularly if the tag is missing; but sure as the sun shines these retailers took back these undies, placed new tags on them and but them back on display. What kind of nasty ish is that? Even if the person never wore them just knowing another person owned the underwear you just bought is pretty gross. Are retailers such tightwads and so much about the bottom lone that they would put their customers health in jeopardy: apparently so. So for all you ladies and gents who like to buy their ladies sexy undies or who like to cross dress (I don't judge) inspect the underwear carefully before you buy and please make sure you wash before wearing!

The link is below!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/35659447#35659447

Fight Night

So I saw this article about a young girl getting her faced permanently scarred in a fight with a chick who dates her sister;s ex boyfriend. Why do girls fight over dudes and in this situation why is the girl attacking the sister? I've seen girls become permanently scarred over guys before and I don' t really get why. When I was in middle school, I watched two chicks fight over the same dude. Both girls were around 17 and apparently sleeping with this guy. By the end of the fight, both girls had been cut with box cutters. One across her face and the other across her chest and the worst part about it was that they were cousins. Cousins! Two cousins permanently disfigured each other over a guy who literally watched them knife each other and did nothing to stop it. Why do women act such as ass over a guy?

You see girls fighting each other over guys who aren't either of their boyfriend or the chick who catches her cheating man and wants to fight the woman. Why expend all this energy and subject yourself to physical pain for a guy who is probably a dog and doesn't even want you? When will girls realize that fighting over a man means nothing to him besides entertainment and a boost to his ego. Ladies let it go and stop hurting yourselves over a man. Is a guy who you won't be with in 3 months really worth permanent disfigurement to your face or body? I think not!